Questions such as, "Did God really make the world in seven days?," "Is every word of the Bible really true?," and "Why did Aunt Milly die?" often throw parents for a loop. I get lots of calls from panicked parents saying,"What should my answer be?"

I have two answers to this question. First is that we, as parents, have our own faith traditions and beliefs that are important to us and we have to decide for ourselves what we feel is of great importance to share with our children. When our children ask these questions, we have opinions and you every right to share them. I would simply caution you to do one thing: begin your answer with, "Well, I believe..." so that your child hears that this is your belief and at the same time, this response allows space for your child to think about their response to the question.

In my experience with children, telling your child what they must believe rarely works. At some point in their lives they question, search for their own answers and even rebel from the things that have been forced on them.

By sharing your faith in a non-forceful manner, you allow your child to have his or her own opinion while at the same time allowing them to claim their own spiritual voice. Your child adores you. They value your opinion very much. They will listen to you. Many of your faith beliefs will become theirs as well. But by forcing, we often push our children away.

I believe the best answer to difficult questions about faith is to simply say to the child, "I have my beliefs on this topic, but I want to hear yours." This communicates to a child that their opinion is valued and more importantly, it encourages the child to think about difficult questions and begin claiming for themselves their own theology.

Right now, you are with your child every time a difficult questions arises, but you will not always be there. By allowing children the spiritual space to think about and makes sense of God and where God fits into their world, we allow them to discover a firm foundation they will stand on long after we are gone.

Let me stress--this does not mean we should not share our faith with our children. We should!!!  We simply need to allow a bit of space for our children to think, reflect and discover God's presence for themselves. If we share our own opinions and at the same time encourage our children to share with us as well, we will all grow in ways we never expected.

So the next time your child asks a difficult question, relax and discuss it in an open accepting manner--you will be amazed at how much your child truly understands about God, faith and theology! 

And remember, God is with your child, speaking, encouraging and shaping their spirit--you are not alone! When you do not feel like you have the wisdom to answer your child's questions, trust that God, through the Holy Spirit is answering! You are not alone.