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| A Time to Listen in Reactive Times |  |
| Location: Blogs Leanne's Blog |
 | | Posted by: Leanne | 1/5/2007 8:29 PM | I recently sent an email to a friend mentioning an idea I had and the email was misinterpreted--my friend shot back an email telling me how hurtful my idea was. Once we figured out the misunderstanding all was well.
Later that same day I watched President Bush at a Press Conference and each time a question was posed he made a defenses wince and then would answer or refuse to answer the question.
What do these things have in common with each other and with the spiritual lives of children? In both instances the responding person did not ask a single question. They heard what they thought they had heard and responded quickly and decisively and assertively. In the process of responding quickly, their was no room for clarifying and no room for deeper conversation.
In my work with the spiritual lives of children I find that it is the quick response rather than follow-up questions that shuts down the communication between the child and adult. The child asks a question or says something they believe to be true and instead of a question given in response--the adult offers a jab, a quick answer or correction.
If we want the children in our lives to open up and share with us about their spiritual lives, we need to stop being reactive and start listening, questioning and hearing.
This is very difficult to do--for we live in such a knee-jerk, reactive time-- but it is the first step in helping children claim their innate spirituality.
The next time a child asks you a question or shares a story, follow these three steps: Pause, ask a follow-up question and keep asking questions until your child has been able to truly articulate what they are trying to say and until you have truly listened and heard them. Then respond if you still need to. | | | Permalink | Trackback |
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